Big news from the world of archaeology: foodies may owe their passion to the earliest cookbook authors of the Ice Age. Experts have discovered that the world’s very first cookbook featured showstoppers like Woolly Mammoth Crown Roast and, for the tenderhearted, a simple yet elegant Side of Asparagus.
It turns out, early chefs were no one-trick ponies when it came to the dinner menu. Balancing hefty piles of prehistoric protein with a splash of greenery? Absolutely. Culinary balance clearly never goes out of style, even when your main ingredient weighs six tons and comes with a fur coat.
Researchers are still puzzling over a few key details. For instance, there is no mention yet of exactly how one was supposed to tenderize several hundred pounds of mammoth. Nor has anyone located a chapter on optimal fire-temperature control, though singed eyebrows may have offered their own lessons.
Of course, some things never change: “season to taste” may well have been the first universal culinary commandment. If you can add just the right sprinkle of crushed pebble (or ancient wild garlic), you too can impress your fellow cave dwellers.
Early illustrations even suggest Ice Age gourmets preferred their sides neatly arranged. The Side of Asparagus, for example, appears bound together, perhaps indicating the world’s first attempt at food styling. Who knew prehistoric cooks had such an eye for presentation?
Next time you fire up the grill or debate your seasoning technique, remember you’re channeling an ancient legacy. Good cuisine, after all, has always been mammoth-sized at heart.
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